We Chose “Resting Pose” Because He Was So Very Tired by the End

Rusty was in no condition to be taxidermied, but it was too late. We’d promised Tessie—Tessie who was born sick, who might not make it to seven—that she could have her good boy forever. I’d warned Tim about buying that squirrel in a tuxedo, that explaining taxidermy to a six-year-old was fraught.

Now I sit in my car outside the shop waiting to pick him up, our best boy, the one we chose together just after we got married. He was meant to be a practice for parenting, not a reminder of how badly we’re going to fail at loss.